This Christmas...

This Christmas is a tough one.Seeing how my car insurance is due the 17th.Doing every little thing I can to make money to be able to pay that and have some what of a Christmas.My list is very short this year seeing how money is super tight.I have helped out with more charity things this year than years before.I have sponsored a child from the salvation army tree.I also sponsored a child from my church.This past weekend I played in a Toys For Tots softball tournament. Our team brought the most toys and won a bat for the team.:) I have another Charity Tournament coming up as well for a little 8year old girl that has cancer.

Christmas is right around the corner..

This time of the year puts a dent in the bank account.But a smile on my face knowing I have touched someone heart.:)Most us struggle as it is to get by.Most of my shopping is done because my list is not all that big this year.The past years it has been a pretty big list.Going over board for my family.But not so much this year.I also sponsor a kid from the salvation army tree at our local ,mall.I started doing this when I was 16.I got $25 from my grandmother once a month and most the time I would not spend it unless I had to get stuff I needed.So that money would go towards a little boy and girl I picked off the tree.This year my budget only allowed me to get one little kid off that tree.I circled that tree like 3 times looking over the things they wanted and needed.Knowing I could only buy for one.I had a few in my hand to pick from.A mother and daughter walked up looking over the tree few times.The girl was about 12 looking for a girl about her age she was so excited about the girl she picked.She was willing to give up what money her mother would spend on her for a few presents to make someone else feel special on  Christmas.:) I have got my best friend hooked as well as in picking a few kids off this tree.Think she has been doing it for like 2 or 3 years now with me. I am sponsoring a kid at my church for an event as well. This will be our second year hosting this event.Last year I sponsored 2 kids from this event.Then a group of us from the church usually raise money for the children home to buy stuff for them.We normally all pitch in about 20 as well.We were unable to do so this year.:( But we had a great meal with them and fellowship.:)I love putting smiles on other peoples face.
 This puts a bigger smile on my face and tears in my eyes.Reading it this morning what this little boy is doing.:)
http://www.theledger.com/article/20111209/NEWS/111209340/0/FRONTPAGE?p=4&tc=pg

-REMEMBER-
*Jesus Is The Reason For The Season*

What Hurts The Most?

What Hurts The Most?
Yes it is a song but that is not what I am writing about.But some of the lyrics fit into this.I have been hurt so many times in my life by my parents. The ones you would think that would give up there addictions to have a relationship with there kids.

What Hurts The Most?
When someone knows that they have messed up.When they have broken promises.When they have made up so many lies up.When they know they have hurt loved ones.

What Hurts The Most?

When your dad rather drink his life away.When his trust in you has faded.When he ask me a million questions to see my little brother whom I pretty much helped raised.All his lies.All his broken promises.

What Hurts The Most?
When your mother rather spend her life getting high.When she says she don't feel loved.When you have only seen her maybe 4 times in the past 11 years.Not knowing when I will see her next.All her broken promises.All her lies.


What Hurts The Most?
The things my parents put me through.The things that they have said and done.The promises they have made and broken.The lies they have told me.The pain they have put me through.The way they have showed there love by breaking me into little pieces.


The things I have gone through and have faced has only made me a stronger person.Yes plenty of tears have come from my eyes because of my parents.

Current New Favortie...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r7cnMDwdm3k
 Heather Williams Testimony

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hcYDcLiiXmU&feature=related 
Heather Williams God is still God


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=42k-KLoNnfQ&feature=related
Heather Williams Hallelujah


I heard her song God is still God on the way home last night.So I repeated the lyrics over and over to look it up when I got home. God will take you as you are if you just say the words and open your heart and give it to him.:) 

The sound of breaking...

So I had a dentist appointment this morning at 10:30. I get there at like 10:15 sit and wait for like 5 minutes if that. I have not been to the dentist in while so I was little nervous.When I got called back in the room you could tell someone loves panda bears. They were painted on the wall and all the pictures frames had panda on them. They gavc me the shots in my mouth and then got to work. Just the sound and breaking of the teeth they pulled is a painful sound. The cracking and chipping away to pull it out just hurt my ears.I had to close my eyes and try to drown it out.The sound between that and the air thing to suck up the chipped off parts.Not a sound that I would want to hear every day.Made me want to come up off the chair. My legs started shaking cause it just did not sound good. I was done and out by 11. My face is still numb. Nap time sounds like a plan.

Upward Kickoff

Upward Basketball is right around the corner again for our church.I am some what excited about this year.This will be my 3rd or 4th year coaching.It is so fun to teach the kids how to play along with the word of GOD.Then when they get saved even better.:) It is so fun to watch the little guys play.I hope I have good group kids this year and not ones like last year.My whole team was ADD so it was a challenge for sure.I helped out with 2 of the tryouts.I seen some my little guys from last year so much improvement.One my little ones could barley hit the rim.They barley passed it to him cause he could not shoot that great.But I tried to give everyone a chance to shoot the ball. So I made them pass it to him give him a chance.He made like 3 baskets all season long and the last one he made was the best.There was like 2 seconds left he threw the ball up and it went around the rim few times then fell in. At tryouts when I seen him he has grown maybe inch or two.He was sinking the ball all day long.He did awesome for as small and young as he is.

What is with all the questions from him...

 I got a call from my dad today.Remind you we don't see eye to eye.We don't talk often or see each other often.He called asked me Your coming over for Thanksgiving right? He assumes that I am coming over. I told him I am going with my aunt somewhere.Then he got to asking more questions.Does he really care that much? I don't think so. He wont let my little brother go to her house so what is with all the questions from this man. I get 100 questions all the time from my dad if I want to get my little brother to go get lunch or something. Serious come on the past is HISTORY. Move forward instead of backwards cause that is all your doing.I am not falling into the trap like I have the past few years.My heart is so big when it comes to my little brother.I will put myself in a bind for him.I will dig myself out of it.This time of the year I get hurt and used.Not going to happen this year.

So my status for facebook after getting off the phone is:

People ask questions all the time.
Some ask as if they really care.
Some ask cause there just nosy and want in others people business.
Some ask and really do care.
Some ask and are just curious.
Some ask questions to get to know people.
Some ask stupid questions.
Some ask and assume they already have the answer.